Bravo Youngsters! / Deepti Gupta
| मुखपृष्ठ » | रचनाकारों की सूची » | Writer: दीप्ति गुप्ता |
Teenage is that tender phase of life when bemused girls and boys in their teens need to catalogue their conflicts and confusions with caring support. They are neither adult nor child – they are just ‘troubled tenagers’ - who carry a burden of over confidence, euphoria, as well as insecurities and petty fears . But the other side of the coin is - that they are ‘precious treasure’ of varied hidden talents and potential. This is that period of their life with multiple crisis at emotional and physical level when they often feel - ‘no one understands us, why we are always misunderstood’ ? It is a teenage state of mind and expectation from others to realise their impalpable feelings. No doubt, this delicate transition period requires lots and lots of special attention of their parents . They get hurt and panicky over petty issues, feel ecstatic on small achievements. At this formative period when teenagers are on a inquisitive and impulsive journey of nomadic adolescence, they easily get influenced by anything or any person, they come across. They take everything and every person on their face value. What I mean to say, is that teenagers are not only stupefied but emotionally hyper and raw also.
Though today’s teenagers get exposure more than they require, yet they lack the ability to handle the complexities, they are stuffed with. Absence of timely emotional support, comprehensive sex education, are the core issues which need to be addressed at priority. Lack of knowledge and guidance very often push them to perils and they get trapped by vicious persons, taking them to be ideal and nice as per their innocent and ideal thinking. Later, when those negative persons show their ugly faces, teen kids remorse and feel morose. It is said that teenage lasts - not up to 19 years but to 25 years. Till the age of 25, specially boys remain gullible, unorganized and vulnerable while girls comparatively get more mature, wise and organised. Therefore from teen to twenty phase, troubled teenagers should be given required support and reasonable space so that they can shed out their inhibitions and flourish their creative excellence. Frequently nagging them for their unintended mistakes and lapses must be avoided. As the hard behaviour with young children can make them either withdrawn or aggressive and they become unruly rebels. So they need to be treated very carefully.
In view of this, young folks need a sagacious mentor to tackle their confusions, crazy feelings and caustic reactions wisely - giving perfect shape to their life. Parents, guardians or teachers, any of them could be the mentor of teenagers. Mentors are catalysts. They tap what is already there in - by quoting examples so that the teenagers in learning and growing process can realise their worth. Learning smart things by teenagers for self defense and growth is cool and imparting them to their friends is uber cool. No parents in the world wish that their children ever be abused in any way -the least. Still, children fall prey to either in-home or out-home physical and emotional abuse. In some cases of child abuse, parents are solely responsible as they are unthoughtfully habitual of leaving their children in neighbourhood or at relative’s place for long hours - just to enjoy their own life, out to a theater, shopping and neglect children for many other such silly things. But contrary to these ‘eat-drink- ‘n be merry’ couples - there are caring couples and single parent also under the sun, who are very thoughtful and concerned for their children but despite their best efforts - they miss some string somewhere and the undesirable - unpleasant things happen with their children. Children of working parents and specially single parent - get victimised in their absence. Single parent cannot survive without a job. S /he has to work to run the house as well as to give secure & bright future to children. Having no option - single parent is often compelled to trust some close and trustworthy person to take care of young child after the school time for ‘few hours’ till the parent returns from the job. Those ‘few hours’ unfortunately very often prove to be the darkest for the child as well as for the working parent. In such cases, pathetic single parent goes through horrifying experience along with the child due to the corroded trust. In their ‘Watch & Care’ do, parents lose to locate those unfortunate happenings that take place even after their being so alert & careful. Because offenders smartly influence innocent teenagers and clip them up emotionally, mentally and physically. When the mal-intentions of the offender start unfolding, only then, teenager victims come to know the reality of the person in disguise . They feel helpless and guilty for no fault of theirs. Simmering anger due to their trapping, makes them aggressive with parents and other close persons around. They either start misbehaving and throwing tantrums or withdraw themselves into a shell. Though victimised young kids in the beginning sense the ‘wrong’ - going on with them, but they are too feeble to come out of the spiteful trap. Later, due to the feeling of guilt and fear, they avoid sharing the evil happenings with parents.
For such scary abusive incidents, many of us regret the collapse of joint family system but I disagree with them because I have seen teens feeling lonely and suffering more even, living in a joint family. Members of a joint family busy with mundane routine, carry an indifferent attitude towards teenagers’ problems and taking them for granted , often chide them , snub them when they want to share their problems. This attitude makes teen kids feel lonely & subjugated and one or two ‘ rotten’ minds in the family, exploit and abuse dejected and lonely youngster to no end. Awareness, alertness, warmth and due care is required in a family whether it is joint or nuclear to tend the emotional needs of growing children in their teens. Key need is to observe vulnerable teens and keep an eye on the dangers that may surround them so that they should be rescued from emotional, mental and physical abuse & torture in time. Hence time to time, parents need to monitor the behaviour of their children closely and deal with them softly - taking them into confidence - so that they can open-up to share the knots - growing in them. Hesitation rooted in youngsters’ ethos can be removed through interaction only. This is also true that it is not possible for parents to be at vanguard of their teenage child all the time. Therefore the better option is to groom the teenager and make him / herself capable to sense & counter the abusive behaviour of the ‘dare devil’ and frankly tell parents about it.
These days there is no dearth of Help Groups, NGOs and Counselors who extend their services voluntarily to guide teenagers well. Therefore teenagers should be brave enough to counteract the foul intentions of sick minds in and out their homes. They should never feel shy to disclose their emotional stress and gnawing conflict to their well - wishers. It is the parents / guardians only who can immediately take the proper action either on their own or in coordination with Help Groups. Teenagers should make it a point - not to trust anyone blindly and specially stranger - however polite and sophisticated s/he is. They should not be allured by the glitter of things around. World is not, as it appears to be. A groomed wisdom is required to recognize the ugly faces of people, their ambiguous behaviour and talks. Teenagers need to be on their own guard, especially when they are in the outer world. It doesn’t mean that they should withdraw themselves from social activities or restrict themselves to boundaries. They should go a ahead smartly and confidently in life - following the suggestions of parents till they are well groomed.
Teenagers treasure great talents and pontential within. Identifying their potential, they should be given the confidence that they can create furrow. They possess the caliber to achieve great success in life ahead and can be change makers to bring changes in society. They can shine their raw energies by learning skills in the fields of their talents. If they are engaged in the process of social change, they can become the significant unit of social development. Friendly & cool communication between teenagers and parents or guardians, is good for their healthy growth and over all development. Sound emotional & mental health is quintessential for sound physical health and creativity is one of the tools that leads the young folks in their formative years to their full bloomed consciousness. The elixir of consciousness initiates inner growth. In process, this growth reduces vulnerabilities. Collective efforts of parents and teenagers with strong inputs, can best serve the purpose of making them positively courageous and brave. At this impressionable age, if they could get inspired by Ram, then Ravan also. Once a boy in his early teens, after watching the film ‘Ramayan’ on T.V. enthusiastically said that he wanted to be like Ravana. His grandparents were taken aback and asked why he was inspired by Ravana instead of Ram ? He simply replied - ‘Ravan was so strong and powerful. And not only this - he was blessed with a divine power of transforming and through that power he transformed himself into a deer…..how cool and interesting !! While Ram seemed to be quite weak who roamed around in jungle weeping for Sita. More over, before this, he could not counter the unjust and unfair demand of his step mother Kaikeyi through his father and accepted exile quietly which (exile) invited all the troubles from kidnapping of Sitaji to the battle between Ram & Ravan and thus bloodshed of innocent creatures. His naïve logics were quite amusing and they carried substance as per his thinking in the process of his gradual development as well as the simplicity of his heart. Through such instances I want to say that the need is to mould the purity and honesty of youngsters rightly so that they could become the paradigm of future youth power who can lead the nation at global forums with pride. Fostering teenagers with affectionate care & warmth is conducive to their emotional and social grooming and it further combined would lead them on the path of responsible citizens. Teenage cohort can be a notable segment of varied transformations in the society - like - they can build social cohesion (unity), communal harmony. If they are mobilized to make constructive contributions to community development like civic engagements, anti-corruption drive, clean city drive, green earth projects etc – they can prove their might and capability.
Apart from this, today our youth is aware of the leaps also - India has taken in technology and the amazing results given to national & multinational companies by its techies – it all sets the path of promising future for teenagers who will hold the reins in coming times. But it can happen only when our teens are shielded from evil eyes at their tender and impressionable phase and guided & supported exuberantly.
One more important thing must be taken care of - is that youths, with average academics should not be ignored and marginalised. If we observe, we would find that amazing societal growth comes in often from those who are average in academics because their academic side is definitely weak but their practical quotient is vibrant and strong. So every youngster has his own potential and capability. Some prove their potential early, while other take little time to unfold it. When they follow the process - they leave the brighter ones behind. High degrees and bookish knowledge cannot be the criteria of testing the potential of young force. The key point to remember is - that growing teen-adults, who are average at studies, they are sharp and witty otherwise. Therefore, they should not be dismissed.
If we ground teen cohort thoroughly to invest its energies, it will enrich not only the young force, but the nation also and its social, educational, political, and economical growth. Needless to say, today’s talented youngsters have so much potential in them that if they are emotionally fostered and mentally focused, they can create a history. Cheerio, mighty teens…..!
